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Guest Post by Anasthia Johnson | Life As It Does Blog | Submit a Guest Post

For the sensitive and ultra-conservative, this is not your kinda story. . To add to that, for the sensitive and ultra-conservative, this is not your kinda blog. . but let's not get caught up in introductions.

This weekend me, the kids, and the boyfriend braved the crazy cold weather to watch the Little Rock Christmas Parade (after being FORCED to watch the crappy Jacksonville Christmas Parade because my daughter's band chose to partake) which is a component of our holiday tradition that we continue to maintain.

At some point near the end, my six year old, could not wait to go pee. So the boyfriend did the honorable thing and volunteered to take my son to the potty.

As you are considering what happened next, please remember that my family is not the outdoorsy type. We generally hold our pee for indoor plumbing, so the whole "you have to pee outside" thing probably took my son by surprise.

Once he was correctly positioned to do his business, my son did what he was taught to do. He pulled his pants down to pee. Apparently, the expectation (from the boyfriend) was that he would reveal the portion of his body that needed to perform for this duty and leave the rest of his body cozily covered in the 30ish degree weather. But again, as he was taught, my son, pulled his pants down to his ankles and commenced to go pee.

The boyfriend was shocked - appauled even - to look over and see my son's bottom and a large portion of his legs bare while he went to the bathroom. He asked, "Son, what are you doing?" Of course, my son looked at him and stated the obvious, ".. going pee."

The boyfriend took note of the scene, allowed my son to fully relieve himself, and waited until we were comfortably at home to dig deeper into what he thought was a very odd tendency for my fully potty trained six-year old son. He described, as I have to you, what happened, and waited until the end to burst into laughter.

I had my back to him, so it took him quite a while to figure out that I did not get the humor in the situation. Since I had not caught on, I thought I would address him.

"What else could J do when he went to the bathroom if he did not pull down his pants?" I asked. "Ha! Well, he could've just taken it out. He can't just expose his entire body every time he has to go pee," said the boyfriend. "What does he do when he goes to a regular bathroom: at home, the mall, or at school?"

Without him saying it, I was then able to figure it out. I never gave consideration to what men do when I potty trained my boys. My eight-year old had somehow just picked it up, but not the baby. He did what Mommy does. .

I can do this. I can teach my sons to be a man. I can teach them to be caring, honest, hard-working, dependable.. all the good stuff that comes with being a human being. But my brother, boyfriend, church member, friends, ex (as much as I hate to mention him), are invaluable in guiding me and my sons on the details that I miss..

And by all means, don't die of embarrassment when you learn about the missed details in public. I'm not perfect. Bring it to light. We can laugh and move on.

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I hope the New year has been good to you thus far! Even though I've been out the loop for a few weeks, the Black Moms Club is still buzzing with conversation (smile).

This week I see there are quite a few Hot Topics on the BMC:

• Sexually Abused Men & Boys
• Why He Hates You
  
• Little Girl Drama
• Same Sex Families
• Career Choice | Working from Home
• Backed in a Corner
• View All New and Featured Posts
  

Today's spotlight book is 'Why He Hates You: How Unreconciled Maternal Anger is Destroying Black Men and Boys' by Janks Morton. I was first introduced to Janks' work a few years back when he produced the very powerful, must-see documentary, 'What Black Men Think'.

With the release of his new book, Janks provides us with a new opportunity to get to the root of the issues that continue to affect the black male community and cripple the relationships between black men and women, black mothers and their sons.

You can get your own copy of Why He Hates You by visiting: http://whyhehatesyou.com.

Most Recent Black Books Featured on Black Writers Connect

1. Get the Facts About Health Power 101
2. Black Women Deserve Better
3. Love Is, The Beautiful Black Woman

More to come on the Black Moms Club | www.blackmomsclub.com

This week has been inspiring to me, because I feel like more and more people are not just talking about women and abuse, but they are doing something about it.

I recently donated to the Young Mommy Life Charity for young mothers who have survived sexual, mental and emotional abuse and I encourage you to do the same. URL: http://youngmoms.chipin.com/yml-gives

Also, one of our own BMC Members, Gwendolyn, is currently trying to leave an abusive relationship and she needs your support. She is asking for donations in the form of shoes and clothes for her two young boys. If you can help please visit the forum discussion: http://blackmomsclub.ning.com/forum/topics/957102:Topic:66676

Also, make it about to watch the recently released movie 'Precious'.
Set in Harlem in 1987, it is the story of Claireece Precious Jones, a sixteen-year-old African-American girl born into a life no one would want. Shes pregnant for the second time by her absent father; at home, she must wait hand and foot on her mother, a poisonously angry woman who abuses her emotionally and physically. School is a place of chaos, and Precious has reached the ninth grade with good marks and an awful secret: she can neither read nor write. Precious may sometimes be down, but she is never out. Beneath her impassive expression is a watchful, curious young woman with an inchoate but unshakeable sense that other possibilities exist for her. Threatened with expulsion, Precious is offered the chance to transfer to an alternative school, Each One/Teach One. Precious doesnt know the meaning of alternative, but her instincts tell her this is the chance she has been waiting for. In the literacy workshop taught by the patient yet firm Ms. Rain, Precious begins a journey that will lead her from darkness, pain and powerlessness to light, love and self-determination.